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<title>No — by evanescentdawn</title>
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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29499021">No —</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/evanescentdawn/pseuds/evanescentdawn'>evanescentdawn</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>yukishima [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Ao no Exorcist | Blue Exorcist</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>AU, Angst, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-02-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 01:15:08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>418</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29499021</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/evanescentdawn/pseuds/evanescentdawn</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>“I miss you,” Yukio confesses, raw, and regrets it as soon as the words come up.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Okumura Yukio/Shima Renzou</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>yukishima [5]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/2044456</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>7</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>12</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>No —</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Yukio laces their hands together, presses it tight against his cheek, as if it will make him linger and he can have more longer. He can’t bear to stare at Renzou, so he settles at the white wall but finds he can’t look at that either—unpleasant memories already stirring—and he’s being drawn back to Renzou’s eyes.</p><p>Looking at him like it hurts, and Yukio loses his breath, tightens the hold on Renzou’s hands. Their tangled legs are a comfort weight, the constant presence reminds that<em> he’s here, he’s here, he’s here</em>. But—</p><p>“I miss you,” Yukio confesses, raw, and regrets it as soon as the words come up.</p><p>Renzou’s expression twists even further and he<em> flickers </em>—no, no, Yukio panics, immediately reaches out his other hand, but—</p><p>He doesn’t disappear. He stays.</p><p>He <em> stays</em>.</p><p>The relief is dizzying and so strong, that Yukio  lets go of their connected hands and lunges himself across to wrap his arms around Renzou. </p><p>He feels the impact when they fall backwards and Renzou’s body—real and<em> solid </em>—under him. He’s here, he’s here, he’s here. It’s hard to breathe through the storm of emotions.  </p><p>Desperately, Yukio presses their lips together, and they’re kissing. It’s nothing sweet, but all-consuming, too fast, and not enough, not enough. Yukio kisses Renzou deeper, until he can taste the sharpness and bitterness and sweetness of his blood in his mouth. And he reaches his other hand to tangle his fingers in pink locks, shifts—</p><p>And finds he’s kissing open air. It takes a moment to realise that Renzou is gone before he falls, and this time, instead of warmth, of arms—the hardness of the floor meets him.<br/><br/>Sharp pain blossoms but Yukio doesn’t register it past his panic. <em>H</em><em>e’s gone he’s gone no no no nono—</em></p><p>Yukio tries to chase Renzou, curls inwards and presses on the places where Renzou touches on his skin and tries  to chase him, begging, and begging for it linger and stay but—</p><p>It’s already fading away.</p><p>His mouth isn't bitter, it doesn't taste metallic. And the memory of a pink-haired boy, who flirts like it’s the way he breathes, and smelled like clouds and the sea and came down into his life like lightning… </p><p>It’s all already fading. </p><p>The only thing that is left is the grief—the overwhelming tide of grief and fierce cries that won’t <em> stop.</em></p><p><br/>Yukio is left a mess on the floor, hand grasping uselessly at the air, and doesn’t even know <em> why.</em></p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading!!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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